Tickets are available online via SFIT’s website.

Anyone who missed seeing the live show can now pretend otherwise!

New video drops on Friday. So if you can’t make it to the iO Cabaret, you’ll still be able to get your fix.

We’re here to help.

RIP letthemhosfight@youtube.com
13 September 2006–28 September 2006

Anyway, Let Them Hos Fight has a new new YouTube Channel. Mort Gets Huge has moved as well.

(Google Video and The Internet Archive links are, of course, unaffected.)

Now I have to run to the show because I do everything at the last damned minute all the time.

Mort also gets huge on Google Video and the Internet Archive.

Incidentally, all videos premiere on the Internet Archive first. So once something shows up there it’s only a matter of time before it hits YouTube and Google Video.

Let Them Ho’s Fight will be returning to iO’s Del Close Theater for two very special shows.

Friday, September 15th and 22nd, the Ho’s will bring their unique brand of in-your-face fast paced improv back to where it all started. After spending the last few months downstairs in the Cabaret space with their good buddies Cook County Social Club, the Ho’s are ready to once again destroy the DCT stage.

Get ready to be totally a’sploded.

Let Them Ho’s Fight.

Where: The Del Close Theater, 3541 N Clark St, Chicago IL 60657-1611

When: Friday, September 15, 2006 & Friday, September 22, 2006 @ midnight CST

Tickets: 5 bucks at the door

I’m bored at work, so I just did a free writing exercise. Here it is:

Where did the phrase panty waste come from? You know? Does it mean, like “I wouldn’t waste a good pair of panties on you.” Cause if that’s the deal, who gives a shit? Or does it mean “You’re about as useful as a pair of panties. Which isn’t very useful at all, for anything other than covering vaginas. So why don’t you go cover up a vagina and stop wasting my time. You waste of space. You panty waste of space. You panty waste of Space Jam, the partially animated Michael Jordan movie. That’s how much you mean to me. As much as a crappy 90s version of Bugs Bunny, in a jersey. In space.” I bet it probably means the latter one. Pretty vicious.

Nice. Just killed a half an hour. See ya dudes!

That’s what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.

—David Wooderson, Dazed and Confused

Happy birthday, Forest.

Love,

Your Friends

So, lets wrap up the Del Close Marathon, shall we?

First off lemme say that I think I can speak for all the Ho’s in saying that we had an awesome time in New York. I got to chill with my girl alone for the first time in months, Brandon got to see a Jankees game, Mort got to take an unexpected road-trip, and Forest drank.

Also, I wanna thank all the staff at The UCB Theater for running a top notch marathon; things were run smoothly and professionally. In addition to doing the DCM show, the Ho’s did a show at The PIT, opening up for Elephant Larry who are a bunch of incredibly welcoming and funny dudes.

Another cool thing; this was the first time I haven’t had to take any trains while in New York. Courtney booked our hotel (Ramada New Yorker, nice place) and it just happened to be right down 8th Avenue from all of the places we needed to be during the weekend. So that kicked fucking ass. Great weekend.

People from all around on our street were collecting under the L tracks to gawk at the flame, which was currently engulfing the transformer and pole, and threatening the garage in which i had just parked courtney’s car. So that sucked. I found Courtney and a naked Ian (the power had gone out from the explosion just as he was getting out of the bath) around front and let them know I was not blowed up, then I returned to the alley to talk to the fire and police people when they arrived.

The story ends on a positive note, as the Firemen arrived in time to put out the blaze before it lit up the garage, the car, or our house. So that was nice. We’re still, however, without full power, and haven’t been able to run the AC units… So we’re staying with friends (thanks dudes), as it’s hot as a motherfucker. Still.

I’ve got a couple of pills for the plane ride. I get a little scared up there. Now, it’s not the kind of scared where I start a low humming under my breath that gradually becomes a crazed scream. More like a compulsion to touch the inside of my fingers in a rhythmic pattern and an understanding of how someone might do that hum to scream thing.

These pills though. Holy moly. Remember the feeling of safety that comes from sitting in a hammock as a child, the amber sun warming the logo on your t-shirt? These pills feel like that, plus you’re getting your dick sucked.

So the plane ride should be cool. I’m not exactly sure where I’m going to be staying as of yet, which is hilariously irresponsible, but I’ve got a cell phone and some numbers for when the shit goes down. I’m looking at it as a grand adventure in the spirit of a young Bob Dylan. If Dylan knew a total of four songs on guitar and his uncle lived on Staten Island.

Both of my teams got really good slots too. On Friday night, Let Them Ho’s Fight is right after Ian Robert’s one man show. It’s a huge honor actually, because he’s so hilarious and that show, which is just him improvisiving solo for a half an hour, is pretty amazing. So I’m anticipating a fun, strange weekend.

I need to go pack. I’ve been proscratinating. Last night, for example, instead of doing laundry, I tried out the new bong that we got as an apartment gift. It’s the height of a toddler. Bongs are great because they’re for people that need a foot and a half of smoke in their lungs, immediately. But I would have felt negligent if I hadn’t used it. Like I’d let down my skinny, blue three year old. The one with the pull away bowl.

So hopefully I’ll have a couple of stories for Monday.

SYSC (see ya soon cutie!)

Where: The UCB Theatre, 307th W 26th St, New York NY 10001-5812

When: Saturday, 28 July, 2006 @ 10:30 PM EST